Show Notes

Robert Foster is a man of incomparable strength and resilience. His passion is showing others how to embrace public speaking, owning their failures in life while using them to inspire others, and ultimately helping you to forgive yourself.

Join me as Robert and I discuss storytelling, telling your Story Brand, and why YOUR story is important.

How to Contact Robert:

LinkedIn Profile: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robert-foster-740a9bab/

Facebook Profile: https://www.facebook.com/rfoster74

Twitter Profile: https://www.twitter.com/rbf_fitness

Instagram Profile: https://www.instagram.com/robert_b_foster/

YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCFYnl_eyAtT29l4nj3oc31w

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Are you a coach, consultant, or online course creator who are looking to grow your business, increase your income, and scale your impact? Connect with me at YourMarketingMatchmaker.com I look forward to hearing from you.

Watch the Podcast Here:

Hey there. Thanks for listening and welcome to the marketing matchmaker podcast. If you're looking to grow your business, increase your revenue and scale your impact all while staying true to who you are and the people you serve. This is the show for you. I'm Jennifer Tamborski, digital marketing strategists, fractional CMO, and founder of Virtual Marketing Experts. My team and I work with six and seven figure coaches, consultants, and online entrepreneurs who are tired of playing the guru game of one size fits all marketing. They're ready to create a business and marketing strategy that actually builds relationships with their ideal clients creates massive shifts in their business and rapidly increases their revenue. As your marketing matchmaker, I'm going to help you find the perfect marketing match for you. This show will teach you how to reach your ideal client, connect with your audience, build that perfect relationship and generate more revenue. All through a process I like to call dating your ideal client. Now let's go have some fun!

Jennifer (01:14):

Hey there. Welcome back to marketing matchmaker today. I am super excited to have Robert Foster as my, my interview today. I actually have a bio of him, but here's the reality. I met Robert by getting on his live streaming podcast a couple of weeks ago, and I was super impressed with who he was and his story. So rather than going into a boring bio about someone, I really wanted to invite Robert to just tell us about him. And then we're gonna talk about what he does, which is story brand. And if you don't know what story brand is, you are absolutely going to want to listen to the end of this video because it will change your marketing perspectives forever. Welcome Robert. Thank you so much for for coming today.

Robert B. Frost (02:07):

Thank you for having me appreciate it.

Jennifer (02:10):

So, as I said, I was super impressed with your story with your background. So share with the audience kind of where Shut Up and Grind came from and how you got started down this path.

Robert B. Frost (02:25):

All right. Well, you have to go all the way back to my childhood. So I'm the youngest of seven siblings and we were all athletes. My parents were also athletes well at, at that stage in their life, they were in a bowling league, but no, but my father was a border borderline Olympian and it would have been a Vietnam didn't break out in the sixties. So we, we always had that, that competitive push. But with me being the youngest kind of developed a little chip on my shoulder because the older siblings, so they were winning ribbons and trophies and awards and you know, and so obviously they were garnering more of the attention from my parents. But then at a young age, I figured out if I just stopped crying, mom will come to me. So, so they, so they will all tell you that I was such a cry baby growing up, but I was still watching them cause wanted that attention they were getting and not just from our parents, but getting their headlines in the paper, getting their pictures in the paper, you know, being mentioned on the news and through all of that, I got labeled. So, and so's little brother.

Robert B. Frost (03:33):

Oh, I hated it, I’m the youngest of seven. So this went on for a long, long time.

Jennifer (03:48):

You were always somebody's little brother!

Robert B. Frost (03:48):

Oh man. And so, but with where the Shut Up and Grind mentality came from was my dad. I mean, my mom too, my mom, she was, she was a total workaholic back then. Cause you figure we're family of 9. Yeah. So like she was constantly working and dad he's, he was an engineer and he was constantly building and there was nothing that he, that he couldn't do no matter what roadblock he hit, he just found ways around it. It's like, if this is what I want, this what I want, I'll just give you a quick story to summarize. And it it'll make it all crystal clear. So my parents bought a new refrigerator and they bought a new dining room table.

Robert B. Frost (04:31):

And so their kitchen and dining is kind of one room and so, so they both come in and, but now when you, when you went to open the door to the fridge, it would hit the table and so, and so we couldn't really move the table cuz then we couldn't open up the door. Right? So the like the door to come in and out of the house. So normal people would have returned one of the two and got something smaller to make it fit. Now I'm, I'm gonna show you the essence of Shut Up and Grind. So I I'm driving down to my parents' house to visit and I pull in the driveway and the siding on the half of the house is ripped off. This dude reframes the house to reverse the window and the door because he wanted that table,

Robert B. Frost (05:25):

And he wanted that fridge. So he had to redo wirings. He had the had to replace and switches. He had to like cut stuff off, reframe it completely. Reinsulate it. Cause, cause he wanted what he bought.

Jennifer (05:49):

That's awesome. I mean, that really is awesome. I do have to say your poor mother!

Robert B. Frost (05:49):

She, she understood. She knew just when his wheels are turning, just stay out the way and let him do what he does, but grow. But growing up with a dad like that, it just, he just taught us no matter what happens, you keep moving forward. He's like things are gonna be tough. He's like people are gonna notice the color of your skin. He's like it's up to you to help him see beyond it. He's like be so great that no one can deny you. That's

Jennifer (06:16):

Fantastic. That is a fantastic upbringing and mindset to instilling your kids.

Robert B. Frost (06:20):

Yes. And now, now I'm doing the same with my crew.

Jennifer (06:23):

That's awesome. That's awesome. So your, um, part of your story, I know also involves an injury that, that you had, um, several years ago. So tell 'em about that.

Robert B. Frost (06:39):

Yes. So the injury changed, everything. It changed absolutely everything. So before we get to the injury, we have to get to the buildup for the injury to happen. So I, I had let myself go physically one time and this is a separate story in itself, but my ex-wife just ran out on my 13 month old son and I, like I was at work. He was at the babysitters when I got the, the call that she was on the train, you know, leave. I was like, oh wow. Oh, okay. And mind you, I was that dad. I was working 10 to 14 hours a day. I didn't know what time this kid ate. I didn't know. You know, what, what time he napped? I didn't know what medicines he took. I didn't know any of that stuff. And so you get that, that stigma that once you're a parent, you just drop everything and you raise your kid.

Robert B. Frost (07:31):

And so that's what I did. I stopped playing basketball. I stopped running. I stopped going to the gym. I stopped all of that stuff. And you know, you think you just have to shovel junk food down your kids throat. And so if the kid's gonna eat junk food, then I may well eat junk food. Right. And then next, next thing you know, I went from having the body of an all American athlete just a few years prior to now I'm like 50 pounds overweight. And so I stepped out of the shower this one day and, and I caught my reflection and it wasn't even about the weight. It was just the fact that you are an all American, you know, like the, the level of dedication and discipline that it takes to reach that level. And I'm gonna let the fact that she decided to abandon us, make me lose who I am.

Robert B. Frost (08:21):

So I was like, so I was like, no, like that's not, that's not happening. I went through and I got all the junk outta my house. Had I known better back then? I would've donated it, but I just threw, put it in a bag and threw it in a dumpster. I, I found a gym that, that had babysitting joined the gym again. I bought a jogging stroller and I had, I had friends down at the basketball court. So they would take turns, watching them while I played, you know, and so, and so I got back to doing all the things that I enjoy and less than five months, I, I knocked off 45 pounds and I was like, you know what? That's never gonna happen again. So now the next evolution is I wanna start competing in track again. Cause track track was where, where I reached the all American status.

Robert B. Frost (09:06):

I said, so I wanna get back on the track. And so now this was before I was into fitness. So I was a restaurant manager then. So being an athletes like you, you kind of know how to train, but not really. So, cause like had I knew back then what I know now about how the body works in the energy systems. Oh my Lord. I would've been unstoppable, but so I'm just doing what I know. And I'm training, I'm training, I'm training, not realizing I was over training one particular area. And so the time comes for the track meets the master's championships 2009. And I get out there the long jumpers up first. So I run down, you know, I felt a little tug in my right quad, but it wasn't enough to stop me. So I kept going and I ended up winning the long jump.

Robert B. Frost (09:54):

And so high jump was now the high jump was my main sport. And so I, I get out there and we'll fast forward a bit is I won my age bracket. So I, I was in a 30 to 34 age bracket at the time. But there was still a 45 year old jumping and the way my competitive spirit is set up, I, I can't let him beat me. I can't do it. And so my, my, my ex at the time even said, she's like, you were already won. Like what do you have to prove? And I said, everything. I was like, cause again, that's, that's just how I'm wired. And so I get out there, you know, I jump, I make it, he jumps. He makes actually he jump first, but anyway, so we get out to the next height. He jumps, he misses it.

Robert B. Frost (10:38):

I jump, I make it. So now points wise I'm ahead of him. And so he ends up making it so down the next one, he goes, he misses it. I go, I miss it. But now I feel a tug in my left knee. And now I had, I had tendonitis in that knee at that point for like, I don't know, 12 years I wanna say. So it was nothing abnormal to feel discomfort there, although the tug felt a little different. And so I yelled over to my ex, I said, throw, throw me the tape. I said, I said, I'll tape. It said, cause I don't think he has it in him to make this jump. So I said, let me take it. Let me get one last jump. And then, well we'll be good. Little did we know, I was very good after just one last, just one last jump.

Robert B. Frost (11:20):

So I get up there and when I tell you that conditions couldn't have been more perfect. Like the sun was perfect. The wind was perfect. I felt good. You know, outside of that tug. So like, this was my moment. Like this is what I trained for. It was like just five months prior. And I was out of shape and couldn't even been running a quarter, a mile and here we are, I'm about to get right back to championship form. And so I'm coming down to do my jump. I plant, I saw whiteness. When I came to, I was on the ground. I looked down at my left knee and it wasn't there. Oh, yeah, it went about that far up my quad. So my, so my patella tendon and some other stuff in there just completely gave way and, and that's not even the worst part, part of the story, believe it or not.

Robert B. Frost (12:12):

So we'll fast forward for it again. Um, in the ER now and the ER doctor comes in, so the EMTs had put, put a brace on. He undoes, he UND undo’s so he undoes the brace and without missing a beat, he just looks down and says, Ooh, you're never gonna run or jump again. And now my, I just got back into shape. My fourth and fifth children. I have twin boys were four months old and I have the three other kids that had a two-year-old. And then my, my older kids, I think they were eight and 10 at the time or seven and 10. And so I'm like, I start crying. I'm thinking like, I'm not gonna, I'll never be able to run around with my twin boys. Like they, they don't even walk yet. And just think about, about the two-year-old, he was active as hell.

Robert B. Frost (13:03):

So I'm not gonna be able to take her to the park and run around the sand anymore. And just all these negative thoughts just took over my, my emotions and in my mind. And then I got right back. I like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You know, and I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll be good to your show and I'll censor some of what I said, but, but I said, you don't f-ing know me like that. You know, I said, so this is what we're gonna do. You're gonna fix my knee and then I'll take it from there. And I did. So I started physical therapy and they gave me minimums to do each day. They did not give me maximums. So when I tell you while I was outta work, like they gave me a machine, its called a CPM machine that helps you bend your leg.

Robert B. Frost (13:50):

They, they said minimum three hours a day. I was on that baby sun up the sun down all day long bend and bend and bending. And I had this, this machine to cause two, two of my muscles in the quad had full atrophy. They, they went completely dead. And so I had to electrostim them, it took three months for them to contract again. But same thing all day long, I had that thing just trying to get them muscle to fire. And once they finally fired, I said, the comeback is happening. You know, it's definitely happening. So they said I was gonna, I was gonna be in PT for 18 months. I got out in four and I ran five months later, granted, I looked like a newborn giraffe but, but I still ran, you know, and so know to, to close out this part of the story is where it changed.

Robert B. Frost (14:40):

So I was, I started doing obstacle races, you know, I was back to playing basketball and playing volleyball, but I got hurt on the track. Mm. You know? And so it took seven years and a kidney donation to my sister later because where that's relevant is they have an Olympic style competition for transplant recipients for living donors and for deceased donor families. And so I, I knew of this event cause one of my cousins had, she, she had kidney issues, her pretty much her entire life. And so I know she competed it in, in it a couple times. So once I did the donation with my sister, I was like, I can compete in these transplant games, you know? And then that would be the, the perfect completion of the comeback. Let's say, cause if I don't get back out on that track, then the injury still wins. Even though I was able to do other things, but I, I still had that fear cause in an instant, I went from being in the best shape of my life at 34 to having a walker during my rehab. So like it happened so fast. Yeah. And so it happened 2016 in Cleveland, Ohio. I didn't even have any, any expectations for, for the hight jump. And I ended up winning it, you know? So like I won the whole thing, representing team, new England and from 2016 through now, I haven't lost. That's amazing.

Jennifer (16:11):

That's amazing.

Robert B. Frost (16:12):

I beat everyone. That's even the 30-year-olds, you know, and everyone else like overall I've won everyone since. And I, I, I broke the hundred meter world record for the transplant games at 11.3 seconds. And, and again, it's like, I, I just tell that not to really brag. I tell that to see, I said, not really like I'm bragging a little.

Jennifer (16:34):

You deserve to brag a little,

Robert B. Frost (16:36):

Let's be honest, you know, but it's like, that's the power of letting somebody else define your future. Had I just let what that doctor said, sink in and just let that become my reality. Then my story wouldn't be as powerful as it is.

Jennifer (16:54):

Right. And I love, and the reason I, I did this episode, this way, this introduction this way is because your story is so central to who you are and what you do to shut up and grind and really how helping people step into their greatness or more certainly share their greatness. Right. Because that's where the story brand comes in in general. Yes. Um, is, is really sharing your story, um, and, and kind of highlighting how your story affects your life and gives you that expertise to then help others. So tell us a little bit about story brand, um, kind of what it is and, and why people are wanting to, wants to use it.

Robert B. Frost (17:44):

And in typical Rob fashion, I'm gonna answer your question with a story. So in, in Providence, I'm a volunteer, a volunteer coach for a group called the Social Enterprise Greenhouse, where we help startups take their idea and actually turn it into a business. And so where I come in is I help people with their, with their pitches and excuse me with their pitch slash brand story. So I was working with three women. This was three weeks ago. And as I'm working with the three of them, so the first one, she started her, her business, cuz she wanted to help people with chronic illness. It's a, uh, holistic healing business. And so as I'm listening to a pitch, it was very generic. It, it didn't really speak to any one person. And there was no lean-in moment. Know its like that, like when I was telling my story about the knee, I said, and I looked down and it wasn't there.

Robert B. Frost (18:43):

Yeah. Right. That's a lean in moment. It's like, holy crap. What happened? You know? So I, I, I gave her some, some pointers. I said, all right, now do another take. So she goes through, through again, give her pointers, do another take after this third take, she tells me she survived a stroke at the age of 36.

Jennifer (19:07):

Wow. That's a lead in moment.

Robert B. Frost (19:07):

Yeah. I said, why did it take 30 minute it, for that to surface, I said that has to be at the heart of your story. Yeah. Cause, cause you went through a chronic illness, you know, it's like some people have lifelong, lifelong, um, side effects from a stroke. I said, and you started your business because you found a way to reverse the effects of what happened to you. I said that has to be woven into your pitch.

Robert B. Frost (19:35):

And so she said, well, I'm really not sure how to tie it in. I was like, you know what? Free of charge let's get on the phone, like said let's get on zoom for one hour and I'll help you get clarity with that. And as I was talking with her, another woman and well, one of the other women was like, well, you know, I have, I have a pretty, pretty powerful story as well. And I was, I was like, okay. I said, do, do you wanna share what happened? And she's like, yeah, cuz she was kind of hesitant about it. And she's like, I just don't know if it would be too over the top. I said, okay, just if, if you're comfortable sharing then share. So I guess in her twenties, so she then she's around my age now. So in her twenties, her first love committed suicide in front of her.

Robert B. Frost (20:21):

You know, and so same thing though, her business is helping people cope with trauma. So again, it ties in it's like you, you don't have to figure out how to weave it in. You started your business because of what you went through. I said, but the thing with storytelling is we're not telling the story just to highlight us. So I said, once you, I told her said, it's not about what happened. It's about one second after it happened through today. I said, you have to live with that vision. You, you probably still have nightmares your heart probably still aches. And all of that needs to be into your brand story cuz for someone else who's going through trauma. That's the lean-in moment. It's like, I'm gonna work with her cuz she knows firsthand what I'm feeling. So when I read these brand stories that are just like a resume, you know? Well, so, and so spent 20 years doing this and has this education in this many degrees and they have a big house in Peoria. Right. And it's like, that's all well and good. But nobody cares. That's

Jennifer (21:31):

Just it. Right? I mean that's the thing that I think people miss so often is that your ideal clients honestly don't care about you. They don't care about your accolades. They don't care about your certifications. They don't care about any of that. They care about how you can help them. Yes. And the reason I love brand stories so much is because you can connect with someone else's like there's some piece, even though maybe I didn't have anyone commit suicide in my life, but I can still connect with the trauma that the woman would through. Yes. Um, and that is where that real connection comes in. Um, when it comes to your marketing and, and your story.

Robert B. Frost (22:17):

Yeah. Cause as you know, there's only five, five emotions, you know, it's like, we can act like there there's more, but there's only really five emotions. So whatever caused you sadness or hurt or anger is it's gonna resonate regardless of what the source was. Know what I mean? So like you can take someone who went through an awful, awful divorce telling that story of watching your loved one, commit suicide in front of you. That the, the hurt, the hurt is still there. Exactly. You know, it's still there. And one thing I wanna clarify it's when, when, when we say people don't care, they don't care in that moment. You know? So people, people don't get on my fitness website because they're feeling great about themselves. It's like they get on my, my website cause they hit that point. Like I told about my shower story.

Robert B. Frost (23:07):

When I stepped out, I was like done. Like at that moment, I don't wanna read your resume. I wanna see how you help people. Exactly. You know, I wanna see what you've been through. Like what have you been, why should I entrust you to help me get to a place? You know, where I wanna be. And so, and that's also the differentiator between someone who went the highest school, went to college, got a degree, got a job, working with a certain demographic. It's completely different when you've experienced what you are working in. It's completely, it's like I had that moment in the mirror. So when people come to me and they say, I let myself go. I I'm like, listen, I was there. I was there. I looked, I looked at my, at my, my reflection. I said, but there's a difference. Cause when I looked at mine, I didn't just look at everything I didn't like about me. I looked beyond it and I saw that all American athlete again. I need, I said, I need to feed him. I'm not, I'm not worried about what I see. I see what's beyond it. And that's power of brand story.

Jennifer (24:14):

And I think it's essential in the coaching industry more than anything else, because yes, coaching is a very personal kind of industry where someone really needs to be able to connect with your story and how you got from point A to point Z, whether it's fitness or weight loss or money or business, doesn't really matter what you're, what you teach, what you coach on. These people have to be able to go; They get it. They understand where I'm at now and can help me more importantly, they get it and they moved past it and moved to that next point. Like you said earlier. Yeah. It's not what happened from before. It's what you did from that point forward. Yes. And that's how brand story can really help coaches to connect with their, their clients.

Robert B. Frost (25:04):

And think about this many times, have you gone to a doctor and asked for their credentials?

Jennifer (25:11):

Never.

Robert B. Frost (25:13):

Never, even as a fitness coach, I've coached. Oh, well over 2000 people, maybe even far beyond that at this point. Cause I, cause I've been saying 2000 people for a few years now. So, so it's probably, it's probably closer to three now, and only three people have asked me about my certifications. Yes. And all three of them were former trainers. Cause nobody else, nobody knows what CPT means. What CSCs means and NPT, like other trainers know the average person, they couldn't care less like, listen, I just sat on the couch. I ate an entire tub of ice cream and cried my eyes out. You know?

Jennifer (25:52):

So like, all they wanna know is you can help them, right? Yes. Like you can help them get from whatever their lowest low is right now to where you're at or close to or something. You can help move them and transition them in that way.

Robert B. Frost (26:08):

Cause like I remind people all the time, there are people who are highly educated who are in jail right now. You know, so, so leading with all of that stuff, I mean, it has its place in your brand story, but it shouldn't be the first thing that you lead with. Yes. You know, it's like mind mindful. My speak about, about your itself program is I talk a lot about the passing of my father, you know? Cause people, people always say, you know, it's, it's the worst thing that you can do is be bury a parent. And I would argue maybe not it, it depends on the circumstance. Cause, and now I know I'm not trying to contradict what I said earlier about, you know, the hurt, the hurt is the same, but there's, there's different levels to the hurt, you know.

Jennifer (26:54):

Quite frankly, burying your parent, isn't nearly as bad as burying your child. Right. At least from my perspective, like that's, there's a deal different, deeper level of hurt if you're bearing your child versus burying a parent.

Robert B. Frost (27:07):

Yeah. Well even sticking with the parent theme, there's still different levels. Like with, with my dad, we knew it was coming so we, we, we had time to mentally prepare, you know, we had to end care for him. So they unsedated him enough to where he could shake his head. Yes. And shake his know there were three generations of us surrounding his bed. We all got to hug him, tell him we loved him and say goodbye and thank him and say goodbye. So we, we had that moment with him and plus I had him for 45 years. Yeah. You know, so I had a guest on my show. I think it was just two or three weeks ago where his, his mom was pregnant with him while his dad was fighting in Vietnam and his dad didn't survive.

Robert B. Frost (27:49):

So, so he, so he never even knew his father. So why am I gonna gonna be ungrateful that I had mine for 45 years? Yes. And, and now the other side to that, one of my fitness clients, she found out this was just just maybe 6 months ago, maybe a little longer than that. Her father at 62 disrupt, just dropped. I do think that's so that's a different level. It is, you know, to be completely blindsided like that. No preparation, you know? So for, for me to, to tell my dad's story, like, it's the worst thing on earth, you know? Like that's at it then that's just recognizing that there are things out there that are far worse than, than to just say I lost my dad. You know, he had a, he had a pretty, I'm kinda envious of his, to be honest with you.

Robert B. Frost (28:38):

Like I remember I told you earlier, he's an engineer. And he always told us when he can't use his hands anymore way, he's used to that's when his, his time on this earth was gonna be gone. And he almost called it like the last thing he did before he went to, to the hospital. My, my son is, is, is a mechanic. He and my son fixed my mom's car. He stayed up till one in the morning, even though they had to leave at 4:00 AM to go to the hospital. But he stayed up and made sure he finished that job. Then he went to the hospital and again, that's the essence of Shut Up and Grind. Like the dude's hanging onto life by a thread, but he's like, I'm not stopping until this car is fixed.

Jennifer (29:19):

And that is such a powerful, I think, example to, to have. Um, and, and I do love the, the theme of Shut Up and Grind, right? Like whatever you went through in the past, it matters. And what really matters is what you do from this point on.

Robert B. Frost (29:41):

Yes. Yes. When I'm working with people, that's, that's my, my sentence. What are you gonna do now? Yeah. Okay. That happened. What are you gonna do now? You know, that happened, what are you gonna do now? And so there's, there was a, one of my, one of my, uh, fitness coach friends here in Rhode Island. She went live on Instagram this one time and I've never listened to her live on Instagram, but one of my personal training clients just happened to cancel. And so while I was on the computer doing my, my work, I got the, I got the alert that, that, uh, Coach Costa was online, said, know what? Listen, let's see what coach has to say. Well, I'm doing my work. And this is where I totally believe in the law of attraction. And so the guest she was talking to, she was a, she survived a stroke and a heart attack in her mid-thirties.

Robert B. Frost (30:29):

And so as I'm listening to her, tell her story. Now I was just piecing together my speaking program at this, at this time, cuz like I knew there, there was a need for it. And so as I'm listening to her, tell her story, I was like, there's, there's so many details she's leaving out that could just add more of those lean-in moments to her story. So there's one thing to just say, I, I had a stroke at 36 people like, wow, that sucks. You know, but but when you really get into it kind kind of how, before I got into the, in, into my injury, I gave you the, where I was her, the, the, the injury, you know, I said so, so after I reached out to her and I, I didn't know her from a hole in the walls, she didn't know, know me.

Robert B. Frost (31:11):

I just told her, Hey, I listened to you live said, I think your story is great, but I think we can tell it better. You know? I said, so if you're interested, I can help you with that. I know you wanna just connect, let's talk it through, see what you think. And so I spent about maybe an hour with her twice and she's now one of the faces of the American Heart Association. Just from, just from telling her story and I, and I'm not sitting here trying, trying to act like I didn't. Cause I didn't, all I did was listen to her story and I asked the right questions. Yes. And I just asked her things that she didn't really think to share. Yeah. It's like, no, it's like, no, like that's relevant. Like trust me to just come out and say I had a stroke, you know?

Robert B. Frost (31:55):

But like if you work on what you, what are you working on? What are you building towards? Like what was your life looking like? And then it happened. And I'm like, then that's that? Or that's the lean-in moment, you know? So like, just like you, I stopped reading my guest bios because I like the story to just naturally unfold. So even though I know what's coming the, the way I ask my questions, it's like, I wanna build to that. So that way people can like, oh my God, you know, it's like, you went through that and you still are doing this. You know, like that's the power of that brand story.

Jennifer (32:35):

Well, and here's the other thing. If, if you, if you really think about it, when you can develop your own brand story, when you can ask yourself these questions, it gives you more ability to ask your clients these questions. Yes. Right. To really pull out their story so that you are better able to help them. Yes. Do the next thing. You know, whatever, whatever your business, this is, um, being able to understand your client's story helps to move them along.

Robert B. Frost (33:07):

And, and that's, and that's literally every industry, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter what you wanna, people come to me and say, I wanna be able to run a 5k faster. Okay. Why? Like, what would that do for you? Are you trying to compete? Like, is this something you, you, you're running from? You know, this, something you're running towards is like, there's a reason why that's so important to you. And once we get to the heart of that reason, I can now push you in a proper way. If you wanna lose weight, why? I help someone start, start a, uh, a podcast, right? Why do you wanna start podcast? What's your message? Who's your target audience? What is it about your story that you wanna get through with each episode? You know, like it's, it's, it's deeper than just, I wanna do this for, because it pays well or, or just whatever the reason is. So like once you get to the heart of that, so like my main story is stop limiting yourself. Yes. And more importantly, stop letting other people put their limitations on you. It's like, just cause you can't do it doesn't mean I can't do it.

Jennifer (34:09):

Yep. Absolutely. And what it also allows for you to do is really take them back to that. Why? Right. Because oftentimes as people are go going through a process, whatever the process, it is, it doesn't matter if it's marketing fitness coaching, doesn't matter when they're going through the process, sometimes they hit a wall and they're like, yeah, I don't wanna do this anymore. And being able to really take them back to the, what is this gonna do for you? Why did you really start? This can help to, to give them that shove they need.

Robert B. Frost (34:43):

Yes. And so I would tell another quick story. So one of my, one of the guys I trained with, he, he lost his son at the age of nine. And you know, I've never had to bury a son, so I don't know what that's like, but I've lost people, you know? So going back to the correlation, it's like, I've lost people. And so it was on a Monday holiday. I do do these big classes called throw down. So an hour and a half long and I just beat on them. Right. So,

Jennifer (35:10):

That sounds amazing. That's fantastic marketing right there.

Robert B. Frost (35:15):

You'll be surprised. Cause people flock to it.

Jennifer (35:17):

I know!

Robert B. Frost (35:20):

So this one class, he's leaning up, he's leaning up against the wall and I, I can tell he was kind of emotional. So like I gave him a few, a few minutes to let him do what he's doing. Then I go over to him. I was like, be like, what's going on? And you know, he's, he's crying. He's like, I just miss him. He's like, I, I, I just miss him so much. I'm like, I'm sure you do. I said, do you believe that he's watching you? And he's like, honestly, I do. I said, and do you think right now in this moment he likes what he sees? And so he kind of like leans up a little. He, he looks over. I was like, cause I think he wants to see his dad kicking ass. I think he wants to see his dad throwing these weights around and pushing that sled.

Robert B. Frost (36:03):

I think he wants to round up the other kid angels and be like, that's my dad right there. You know, and then, you know, he, he kind of chuckled that, that too. He's like, you know, he's like, you're absolutely right. You know, I said, you know, nothing, you can do bring him back, but you can, even if he was here, you would have to be the best version of you for him. Right. I said just, just because he's up in heaven now doesn't mean you don't have to be the best version of you for him.

Jennifer (36:30):

Yes, absolutely.

Robert B. Frost (36:31):

And he shook my hand and he was like, you know what? He's like, you're absolutely right. And then he went back and he, and he crushed that, that workout. But it's like, it takes people like us who are in this space to help people realize, even in your worst moment, there's still strength. You know, there were days I would love to hug my dad again and hear his voice and just get those life lessons. Cause he was always there with the life lessons. I would love those moments. But, but again, it goes back to do I'm being selfish. You know, cause he would, he was 78 years old. He would've totally sucked as, as, as an old man, you know, it was like if he had to be like on an, on an oxygen tank or yeah. Or just as his strengths got less and less and less, he would've been miserable. Absolutely miserable. So like that actually warms my heart that he didn't have to go through that level of decline. Yeah. You know? So like even in his passing, there's still positives there.

Jennifer (37:30):

There is, there is. And, and in your story, that's the thing I think everyone gets to be aware of, in your story. No matter what it is, there is always a positive, there is always a way to direct it so that you get growth and change out of your story. Yes. And as a coach or a consultant or really any business owner, if you can verbalize that to your audience, to your ideal clients and connect with them from that level of trauma, whatever, the trauma, big, small, whatever, whatever the thing is that you did and you overcame and shows, show them that there is a way to overcome. I think that is where you can make an immense change in your business and in your marketing.

Robert B. Frost (38:23):

Yes. Yeah. And, and I'll share one, one more. So, as I mentioned earlier, I was working with those three women. So now the third woman, so she just heard a stroke survivor. She just heard someone who watched her first love commit suicide. And she's like, um, uh, mine isn't anywhere near theirs. I said, whoa, whoa. I said, before you even tell me what it is, you do, do not sell yourself short. Yes. I said, cause I can help you make any story. Sound. Absolutely incredible. Right. And so she says, you know, well, my, my, my business is, is creating, how does she call it? Creating outdoor learning spaces for disadvantaged school, like schools and disadvantaged areas in low, low income areas. And I said, you trying to tell me that's not powerful? You know,

Jennifer (39:11):

Just, just what you do is powerful beyond what your story is, is on why you do it. That's powerful.

Robert B. Frost (39:16):

And now let's add the story on top of it. So as I started picking, picking her brain, so they lived not really in a low income area, but they definitely, they were like lower middle class and then her father got a better job, higher paying job, move, moved them out to where there was woods and just more nature and trees cause where, where they were living, there wasn't any of that.

Jennifer (39:43):

Right. Concrete jungle.

Robert B. Frost (39:43):

Yes. And she fell in love with the nature. And so what she wants to do is she wants to go to schools that don't have nature, that all they have is a concrete jungle and build in nature. And I was like, that's, that is absolutely life changing. Yes. I was like, and you just sat there and sold it short. I was like, if you tell that story about being that little girl living, where you lived, describe what it was like, living there, the feelings that went through through your mind. And then when your dad got that job and your family move, what changed for you? Why did you fall in love in nature? What does it do for you? And you extract those feelings and you wanna help other kids feel what you felt that is incredible.

Jennifer (40:30):

Yes. You know, and I think sometimes that is a huge, that's a huge lightning bolt for, I think a lot of people don't discount your story. Your story is powerful to somebody. Somebody needs to hear your story.

Robert B. Frost (40:46):

And one person hearing your story can save their life. So I had a guest on my show, she was suffering from systemic lupus and told you, I, I had a, a lot of guests. It's like all these stories I keep telling from people I interact with <laugh>. And so, and so she was suffering from systemic lupus and the doctors basically told her it's nothing else we can do for you. And so she turned to juicing and, and uh, healthy eating. Yeah. And it, it reverses the effects of her systemic lupus. And so she started sharing her story. She got picked up by a local news station. And so maybe it was like two or three weeks after her segment aired, she got a random Facebook message from a woman who thanked her for sharing her story. Cuz she was on the verge of ending her life. From, from dealing with the, with the effects of systemic lupus. Yeah. So someone that she never, she never knew she stopped her from ending her life. Like that's the, that's the of telling your story. Maybe, maybe you won't get a million shares. Maybe you won't get a million likes, but you just might save someone's life.

Jennifer (42:00):

That is for sure. That is absolutely for sure. No matter what your story is, there's someone that needs to hear it. And more importantly, they there's someone out there that needs to hear what happened, before and then what you did from that point on the change that it came over in your life.

Robert B. Frost (42:18):

And, and they need to hear it the way you tell it. Because I tell the, I tell the story of my dad's passing completely different from my brother. Right. One of my brothers, he took it very, very hard, very, very, and, and again, there's different experiences. Like my parents live here in Rhode Island. No, he he's in New Jersey now. So it's like, if I wanted, wanted to see them, I'm 30 minutes away. So I had, I had a lot more, more time, so I didn't have any regrets in my dad's passing. Whereas I think they, they might have been, well, I could have, I could have came up more. I could have done this and I didn't have to deal with that. So I can't discount his story. Like I can't tell him how my dad's passing should make him feel. Right. You know? And so like he has to tell his story through his lens and then there's someone out there who's dealing with that same way, the way he sees it, they might hear me talking be like, I'm not there. Yeah. You know? So it's the exact same person, the exact same situation. Like I said, I'm one of seven SI siblings. You might get seven different stories on how my dad passed.

Jennifer (43:26):

Yes. And that's very true. Um, and it's, it's, it's true for life and business, right? Yeah. You may be in the exact same situation. You guys may have been in the same car crash and what you experienced and what they experienced were two different things and how it affected your life after, two different things. Yeah. The choices you make after is where you get to highlight the power of, of being able to move forward.

Robert B. Frost (43:56):

Yeah. See, and, and it doesn't even really matter what the choices were because there's still power. Like I chose to, just, to, to, to look at it from gratitude, you know, I had him for 45 years, he didn't live to be 95 and miserable you know, it's like, you know, he fixed mom's car towards the very end, we got to say goodbye to him. Excuse me. But like I said, you know, just through my brother's lens or my sister's lens, you know, they just looked at it differently and it's not up to me to judge their story, say, that's one of the biggest things with storytelling is people have that fear of judgment. People have the fear of sharing too much. It's like, like the woman with the suicide said, like, I wasn't sure if that would be over the top. I'm like, that's why you started your business.

Jennifer (44:46):

Exactly.

Robert B. Frost (44:49):

So that's what holds that. That's what holds people back, but not realizing by you sharing your story as authentically and as vulnerable as you can share it, you're gonna attract the right people.

Jennifer (45:01):

Yes. Yes. And that's what effective marketing is. Period. Right. Is attracting the right people. So instilling story brand into like your story into your marketing and sales and your business overall really does connect you with the people you're supposed to be helping in the long run. So

Robert B. Frost (45:24):

See, go

Jennifer (45:25):

Ahead. Go ahead. No, no.

Robert B. Frost (45:28):

And, and, and I was gonna say, and when people describe what they do, so I'll, I'll use, I'll use, um, someone as an example, I'm not gonna name, blast him though, but he's, he's a fitness trainer. And so I was wor he was one of the first people I put through my speak about yourself program. Cause I wanted, I wanted to make sure it, it can really be transformational. Like I don't want to just be another, another, another storytelling program, but speaker coaching program. I like this one is gonna disrupt the industry. That's that's what I wanted. And so as I'm going through with him, I was like, all right, why did you become a fitness trainer? And so he just starts saying, well, cause I'm good at this. And I'm good at that. And I'm good at this. And if you listen to me, you'll, you'll do this.

Robert B. Frost (46:13):

Like I said, okay, that's good. But that's all about you. I said, so imagine if you were on stage talking to 500 people, how would that message be received? You know, it's like, what are they gonna resonate with from that? So think about that. If you go to your, to somebody's About section and you see, what you just said, where's the lean-in moment. Right. Cause I can find a hundred other people with your credentials, right? So, so what, so what is gonna separate you from the herd? I said now flip it, ask me the, the exact same question. So he asked, he asked me the question. I said, because I'm tired of people having old self-esteem, I'm tired of people hating the way their bodies look. I'm hating the fact that people look into the mirror and start crying. I'm hating that people have a half a closet full of clothes that they're hoping to get into one day, you know?

Robert B. Frost (47:05):

And, and I said, so just take that. I still started with I, but I made it about them. Yes. Now, so those people sitting in that crowd can be a, like, I got a couple things in my closet that I can't fit, you know, or, or I avoid mirrors at all costs, you know? You know? So like you, you wanna bring out scenarios to where they're like, that's me. You know, then at the end of all of that, you can say, I've been training for over 20 years. I've trained over 3000 people. Like then like, then you can, you can add the education on now that you suck them in. Right. It's like, like, okay, it's like this, this guy gets me.

Jennifer (47:43):

Yes. And that's the thing. Right. That's what we wanna do. That's what we always wanna do is speak to our ideal clients so that they, they understand, we get them. Yeah. In some way, shape or form, we've been there. We've done that. We get where they're at and we can help them take them where they wanna go.

Robert B. Frost (48:01):

Yes. And one of the women I'm gonna connect you with. I was, I actually spoke on her, her platform the other day. So she's, she's a chiropractor and she has a masterclass with other chiropractors coming up and she wanted to talk to them about story creation. And she's like, but it's chiropractic’s. Like how, how do, how, how would, how would you, how would you expect us to like insert our brand story about it? I said, Hey, well a, you know, you have a PhD, right? Yes. So why'd you pick chiropractic? Like, what was it about chiropractic that made you invest your time and your money into getting it in, in that field? And then what are the benefits of chiropractic? It's like, no, we, we help with healing. We help with that. And she went through all, all the, I said, right there, you have the story.

Robert B. Frost (48:47):

Right there. So it's, I chose this because I wanna help people no longer be in pain. And as a chiropractor, I get to get up every single day and help people relieve the symptoms of pain, whether it's from sitting at a desk too long, whether you're recovering from, from a car accident. And now you start talking to things that people can lean into. It's like, yeah, exactly. But my neck hasn't been right to, I got rear-ended in 2006. You know, it's like, I never thought about going to a chiropractor, you know? So that, that's how you interweave your personal life into what you do. And then now that makes you a human being. Cause I, I hate watching those, those ads where it's the guy and, or, or woman in a big mansion, and then they're talking and walking and then they get, and they get into a Lamborghini that's probably rented, you know what I mean? And that, that doesn't do anything for me. It doesn't like, I, I'm not motivated by things. Like I wanna know what was your rock bottom. And then, then how did you pivot from that rock bottom? Yes. Right. If, if you taking your along that journey, I will absolutely work with you.

Jennifer (49:54):

Absolutely. Absolutely. I totally couldn't. I think that is one of the most insightful things that my audience has probably heard in a long time. The journey that your ideal clients go through, they want to go with you. They want and travel with you. Yep. Right?

Robert B. Frost (50:14):

Absolutely.

Jennifer (50:15):

All right, Robert, it was fantastic having you on the show today. I appreciate it so much. Can you let our audience know how to get ahold of you? What's the best way for them to connect with you?

Robert B. Frost (50:27):

Well, the best way is RobertBFoster.com. So there, there might be a minute of downtime cause I have a new site being created cause I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready to launch the program. So nice. I, I actually have a, have a meeting with the designer tomorrow, so, so we, we can see how it's coming along, but at some points you're gonna have to take down the old one and transfer it over to the new one. So if that happens, uh, Facebook is the best way for me at Robert B. Foster. Awesome.

Jennifer (50:57):

Awesome. I will put some links in the show notes so people can reach out to you and, and connect. Um, I would encourage you if you are struggling with your figuring out how to do it, how, what to say when to say it, reach out to Robert and let him help you walk through that. Cuz your story brand can really make a difference in your business. Thank you so much for joining us today. And I look forward to talking to you soon.

Robert B. Frost (51:24):

My pleasure. Thanks again. Appreciate it.

Thank You for listening to the Marketing Matchmaker podcast. If you enjoyed this episode, I would love to hear your feedback. Please head over to iTunes and leave a review so we can hear from you. And if you are a coach, consultant, or online course creator who are looking to grow your business, increase your income, and scale your impact connect with me at yourmarketingmatchmaker.com. I look forward to hearing from you.